When book lovers date
Monday, March 31st, 2008I love to read.
In fact, I wish there were more hours in the day so I could read more. David Sedaris, Cormac McCarthy, Jane Austen, Nick Hornby, Toni Morrison, J.K. Rowling, Stephen King — my list of favorites is long.
There’s something magical about books — and, sadly, I don’t share this passion with my boyfriend.
Yes, he’s literate. But he’ll pick up a book only to help him fall asleep.
I don’t have a problem with the fact that he doesn’t read. But I have friends — fellow English majors — who do.
Poor literary taste — or worse yet, making incorrect literary references — are big dating no-nos.
It was exactly the content of an essay in yesterday’s New York Times:
We’ve all been there. Or some of us have.
Anyone who cares about books has at some point confronted the Pushkin problem: when a missed — or misguided — literary reference makes it chillingly clear that a romance is going nowhere fast.
At least since Dante’s Paolo and Francesca fell in love over tales of Lancelot, literary taste has been a good shorthand for gauging compatibility. These days, thanks to social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace, listing your favorite books and authors is a crucial, if risky, part of self-branding.
When it comes to online dating, even casual references can turn into deal breakers. Sussing out a date’s taste in books is “actually a pretty good way — as a sort of first pass — of getting a sense of someone,” said Anna Fels, a Manhattan psychiatrist and the author of “Necessary Dreams: Ambition in Women’s Changing Lives.” “It’s a bit of a Rorschach test.” To Fels (who happens to be married to the literary publisher and writer James Atlas), reading habits can be a rough indicator of other qualities. “It tells something about … their level of intellectual curiosity, what their style is,” Fels said. “It speaks to class, educational level.”
I’ve never dumped a guy because of his taste — or lack thereof — in books. But I can see the writer’s point.
Preference in books — movies, music, TV shows, restaurants — say a lot about a person.
Hmm. I’m into romantic comedies, character-driven plots, “America’s Best Dance Crew” and The Cure.
Wonder what that says about me…




























