22 and licensed to drive
August 7th, 2008 by CatIt’s official!
My 22-year-old sister Crystal — who holds a degree in biology and probably a high score on some video game in this world — is now licensed to drive.
Beware, drivers! (Kidding!)
She passed her driving test yesterday with just minor infractions for stuff most of us do all the time: using poor judgment when entering an intersection and stopping too close to a crosswalk. (Hey, at least she stopped!)
If her driver’s license photo proves anything, she’s completely thrilled to have passed. Because she wasn’t interested in re-living the experience.
It’s funny. She’s the third person I know in their 20s — fourth, if you count my high school classmate who, at 33, still refuses to get behind the wheel — who doesn’t have a driver’s license. What’s more, they don’t really seem to want one, either.
Which, to me, is so strange.
I couldn’t wait to get my license. I was barely older than 15 when I went down to the DMV and took the driving test. (I failed the first time; long story.) I wanted that license so badly. Because it was more than a license to drive. It was my ticket to independence.
(Of course, I didn’t get a car until I was well into college, so a lot of good it did me!)
So let’s congratulate my stressed-out-over-this-driving-test sister who, thankfully, didn’t emerge from the experience with hives.
Any words of advice to share with this newly anointed driver?
***
On a separate but related (literally!) note: Happy Birthday to my dad, who turns 64 today.
He may be getting older, but he can still arm-wrestle me into the ground!
Tags: Crystal, DMV, driver's license, driving, hawaii, sister, toth
August 7th, 2008 at 3:24 am
Cat, Crystal did well to learn and pass her driver’s license in Honolulu. The roads are congested and the drivers terrible, so it’s a true feat of accomplishment.
Have her learn the “aloha” in driving, and don’t be in too much of a rush to do things like run yellow and red lights. It’s always worth an extra moment to stop and let pedestrians cross in the crosswalk, and drivers exit from driveways into the street ahead of you.
When driving on the freeway (or surface streets), I slow down and let the drivers in ahead of me. I’ve found out over the years, it’s much better to let them in ahead of you, and watch them from behind, than to speed up and cut them off. If too many drivers did that, the ones wanting to enter traffic get agitated at not getting into the flow of traffic, and are more likely to dart out at the first opportunity — very unsafe. Instead, give them an opening and let them in. That speeds up traffic behind you because now no one behind you has to slow down worrying if that driver wants in — because you already let him/her in.
My grandfather taught me to drive a standard shift vehicle when I was 12, but he didn’t have time to teach me defensive driving. That I picked up over time, and after a few life-changing near misses……
August 7th, 2008 at 5:41 am
Happy birthday, Catdaddy! You done good. As for driving advice to Crystal: Assume everybody else on the road is either drunk or crazy. You’ll be right far more times than you think. My son, also 22, does not drive or have a license, and has never wanted one. He came of age in the Bay Area and says he can go anywhere he needs on a combination of his bike and the BART. He also told me that he has seen so many of his friends drained of their money by marginal cars. He says he’d rather spend it on all the great food in San Francisco.
August 7th, 2008 at 6:30 am
CAT,
I cringe every time the male progeny takes to the wheel. I have yelled at him so many times when he was learning to drive about making good decisions. Driving is easy, it is the decision making that is lousy for most people. In nearly every accident, it is not so much the driving as the decision making. Speeding, driving too close, drinking and driving, not being aware of what is happening ahead, behind, and on the sides are all decision making stuff.
I asked my son right after he got his license and was going to drive alone, “What are the 5 ‘no’s to driving a car”? He responded with: No drinking, and no speeding. He did not figure out: No taking of chances, No cell phone calls, and No drugs! These basic no-nos are decision making aspects to safe driving.
There are probably more like no driving while angry, no driving in the nude, no driving while eating, no driving while talking to your spouse, no driving when there is a back seat driver, no driving on the center line, etc.
August 7th, 2008 at 7:35 am
Congrats Crystal!
Advice: Drive defensively.
August 7th, 2008 at 7:35 am
Oh yes, and Happy Birthday to your Pops!
August 7th, 2008 at 7:47 am
Congrats to Crystal! and Happy Birthday Mr. Toth!
My 16 year old son got his permit and is waiting to get on the list for drivers ed. I been taking him on the weekends to drive…
August 7th, 2008 at 7:49 am
To add to turkfontaine’s advice: if the other drivers aren’t drunk or crazy, they’re something just as bad — DISTRACTED!
Oh, and when you see a car with balloons inside, know that those people have their minds on a party and also can’t see out their windows! The cars with the “baby on board” signs? That sign really means “Driver is distracted and tired” so be extra vigilant.
Congrats to your sis on successfully jumping through the flaming hoops. May your father be able to out-wrestle you for many more years!
August 7th, 2008 at 7:49 am
I had my kids take the Bob Bondurant’s teen driving class where they teach you skid control, accident avoidance, be aware of what’s happening in front/side of you, cornering technique…one of the main habits that all teens have is to jam on their brakes in critical situations…they teach you to steer away from the situation while using your brakes. I don’t know what they can do about cell phone usage and texting while driving thou…
If you ever have a chance, you should take their High Performance driving classes. Skip Barber has a class in Vegas at their Vegas Motor Speedway, so you can gamble and double the speed limit without worrying about a ticket
.
August 7th, 2008 at 8:02 am
Happy birthday, Mr. Toth!
Regarding cell phones, it’s easy. Pretend you’re flying a $160 million dollar fighter jet. Talk on the cell phone like you’re talking to ground control. Keep it short and sweet, and end the conversation so you can get back to flying your jet with full on attention. Believe me, it’s your money on the line and you don’t want to end in a crash.
August 7th, 2008 at 8:42 am
1. Drive with Aloha;
2. don’t be afraid to use your horn;
3. never use your cell phone while driving (even if it’s a hands off type);
4. obey the speed limits;
5. always be alert.
August 7th, 2008 at 8:49 am
Words of advice…
There’s a ton of bad driver’s out there on the road.
There’s no such thing as “aloha” anymore when it comes to driving.
There’s a whole bunch of cheaters who don’t wait patiently like everyone else.
There’s never a cop around when you need one.
Oh, and don’t pee when standing on your head.
BTW, I failed the first time too when I took it at the extremely young age of 15. I ran a stop sign, ran a stop light, and drove over the sidewalk without looking. It was bad.
August 7th, 2008 at 8:51 am
The advice I would give is to leave the cell phone down until after you get to your destination, drive defensivley and of course NEVER drink and drive.
As far as your dad being able to still arm wrestle you to the ground, you are not alone. I am a larger than average guy but my dad (64) can still beat me at just about everything we compete at physically and mentally. Makes me can’t wait till I have kids so I can continually put them in their place
August 7th, 2008 at 9:03 am
congrats to crystal . . . i couldn’t wait to get mine . . . i think i was around 15/16 too! anyway . . . the only advice i have for her is never assume the other driver sees you, will let you go, etc . . . you know what happens when we assume!!
and happy bday to your father!!
August 7th, 2008 at 9:14 am
i had alot of friends in high school and even a few today that don’t have a drivers license! i can’t understand it…like you i was just barely 15 when i got my learners permit and just a few months later got my license. it was independence…and i didn’t have my own car, but as long as i kept my grades up and helped around the house i was always allowed to use my parents car. i had to put in gas, but that was when it was only $1.54 a gallon…ahhh…remember those days?? when $20 would get you a movie, dinner, replace a quarter tank of gas, and maybe even get you lip gloss…lol!
August 7th, 2008 at 9:39 am
I’m 21, and I don’t have a license. I used to have a permit, but I let that expire. I know I’ll probably have to get my license someday, but for now, I’m okay with getting around on TheBus. Driving just tires me out, I’d rather much sit in a bus and read, study, or sleep.
August 7th, 2008 at 9:57 am
The one and only time I was involved in an accident was when I was 21 and in college. I was driving at 35 mph in the summertime heat in the left lane of a one way street. One second, I’m gazing at the hottie walking on the sidewalk in her short shorts. The next second, I’m slamming on my brakes in a desperate attempt to avoid the inevitable rear-end collision. I was lucky to be driving the same beat up car that I had in high school.
August 7th, 2008 at 10:23 am
A few tips from public service road signs I can recall seeing in the DC area:
Don’t drink and drive; be alive when you arrive.
Stay awake; stay alert; stay alive.
Some won’t wear seatbelts for fear their clothes will get creased; they’d rather be among the ranks of the impeccably deceased.
August 7th, 2008 at 10:26 am
Congratulations to Crystal and Happy Birthday to your daddy!!
I got my permit as soon as I could, took driver’s ed and was raring to go! Until I started driving with my mother… she screams or “gasps” (loudly!) at EVERYTHING (including situations that involve other cars, not mine!)! She made driving so stressful for me that I hated it, hated it, hated it. I didn’t even want to drive the car up the driveway to park it! To me, not having my license was a blessing in disguise - I spent a lot to time riding with friends, talking story - and I also was forced to stay home sometimes (sometimes good when you need sleep!). Consequently, I didn’t get my license until I was in my 30’s! But then, because my mother still did the same thing (scream!), I made her sit in the backseat (now that I could tell her what to do… heh!)… and it made driving much more pleasant!
August 7th, 2008 at 11:40 am
cat ya better build up that upper body strength girl, try doing some push up or bench presses @ the gym lol.
congrats to crystal, on passing her road test & i am sure she is thrilled to get that car to go shopping now.
i am a CDL & drivers ed instructor for “Valentine’s Driving School” & have driven commercially on the mainland as well, and will give you some insight which you not only can pass on to her, but others here might get something out of this as well.
1. impress upon her that the most dangerous period for new drivers are the 1st yrs of driving, stats show that is the period where many experience the most fatal accidents and it also takes approx 5 yrs of driving to become as good as the avg person on the road (imo, the avg person on the road is not that good drivers).
2. staying alert and driving defensively is the key to “safe driving”. try to remember that the hit that you dont see coming will hurt alot more than one that you are prepared for. always keep updating in your head while driving for any “escape zones” directly around your vehicle, you wont need it most of the time but in the moment that you do need it there wont be enough time to do this so make it a point to constantly do it.
3. when reversing always check totally around your vehicle before moving, and signal to the side of the most immediate hazzard (reversing straight back) or in the direction the back of the vehicle is going to end up at (reversing out of a parking stall).
4. when changing lanes, make sure you check your blindspot (over your shoulder) prior to going and always use your turn signal. the lane change manuever should take 3 seconds to complete once you start to move out of the original lane so if you are doing it quicker than that you are compromising traction which could result in loss of control or if you taking longer will put you in added danger (keep in mind the burden of safety is on you when changing lanes).
5. when turning, always look in the direction you are turning prior to moving, this is the most common reason why pedestrian are hit by cars making a right turn @ an intersection. while turning you should look all the way through your turn as well for any hazzards and vehicle placement with eye/hand coordination (any time you see cars going out of the lines while turning at an intersection they are usually not doing this).
6. don’t allow distractions to hamper your driving (cellphone, eating/drinking, talking w/ eye contact, ect). it is also a good idea to notice what others are doing in their cars around you as well.
7. pay attention to all signs you encounter on the road, the signs are like clues for you as to what is coming up ahead. if you don’t understand what a sign means find out later for future reference, example the yellow (<) signs indicate a continuous blind turn and the driver should hold the correct lane position driving through the turn until you have past the last sign you see like this for the turn.
8. the yellow light at an intersection means “clear intersection”, the rule is upon aproaching a yellow light if you can get past the crosswalk (AT CURRENT SPEED) before it turns red you should go. if you can’t tell or not sure then stop. checking the light color ahead of time will help you with this so you will really know how long the light has been yellow.
9. when yielding the right of way, always make sure you have enough of a gap in traffic (based on the avg speed of traffic) before going and should only move to the 1st lane going in your direction and not where you ultimately want to end up. when encounter a school bus w/ the red stop signals on you should stop and yield in both directions of traffic. this is a big mistake that even seasoned drivers make. the kids may have to cross the street and are usually hit by the driver coming in the other direction when trying to cross.
10. the use of the horn is “to alert another person of your presence”. that said, it should be used only in hazzardous situations. when someone toots their horn everyone in other vehicles start checking their mirrors to see if they are the one the horn was intended for. this means nobody is paying attention to the road in front and that makes the situation very dangerous.
11. when dealing with large trucks or buses, use your lane position giving more room towards the large vehicle and try not to be next to the right side of these vehicles because the blindspot on the right is huge compared to the left. a good rule of thumb is allow these large vehicles to merge (even though you can move quicker than they can) alot of drivers can’t understand this but the simple truth is it is equivalent to the “battle of the cockroach (your vehicle) & the rubber slipper (truck or bus); in this situation how many times have you ever seen the cockroach win. try to remember that in an accident you can be wrong, right, and dead right. the difference between being right & dead right is that you are DEAD and if you are dead does it really matter who was right or wrong at that point. pay attention to the load of the large truck, the most dangerous would be cement mixers cuz the load is constantly shifting and can easily lose control, but pay attn to the load eg, construction trucks is the load properly covered. FYI, a fully loaded truck can stop quicker than an empty truck because the added weight will give more traction to the tires but this is not the case with buses.
12. always adhere to ALL of the rules/sign of road. human beings are masters of “the art of compromisation”. after they have been driving for a while they let down their guard regarding speed, signals, ect. they will get away with this alot but when that one moment of truth occurs they will ultimately pay for it. that said driving is not like a video game there is no reset button or “do over”.
by following this simple rules should not only make you a better driver, but should really give you the upperhand when compared to most of the other drivers you encounter out there in traffic…
August 7th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Wow that’s a lot of advice Brother Love, good stuff. Sometimes, especially in Hawaii, being too passive of a driver is just as dangerous as being too aggressive. For God’s sake please accelerate onto the freeway and merge at @40mph or so. And when merging onto the freeway and it’s crowded, you need to make a conserted effort to merge, not just drive at 5mph with your blinker on. Pick a spot, slowly veer towards it, stick out your hand and wave and you’re in. Don’t be too passive. If you’re gonna cuss someone out you need to have tinted windows, or at least not pronounce the words so that the other person can read your lips. Also, any man who drives around with half his arm hanging out the window in an ape-like form is a good indication that they are aggressive jerks.That’s all you need to know.
August 7th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
I would have to disagree with Bonar’s #2…I’m not saying never use your horn, but in Hawaii, it’s like flipping someone off. Now-a-days, you honk at someone and they pull out the gun.
August 7th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Yeah, the only time you should use your horn in Hawaii is to give someone a little beep if they’re sleeping at a red light, or to really avoid an accident, the horns intended purpose. I saw an accident in Maui last year that could’ve easily been avoided if one person had used their horn. That was a bad move. Only use the horn when it’s necessary.
August 7th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
21-22. Yes, I agree. However, I’ve been a passenger where it seems the driver in my car would rather swerve into the next lane or onto the sidewalk instead of honking to alert a car drifting into our lane. And, yes, when I’m behind the sleeping driver at a red I tap ever so slightly on the horn to get them to look up.
August 7th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
#20, haha. And don’t let a passenger hang their bare feet out the window or on the dash.
August 7th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
I live way up above 10th avenue and cops do speed traps there about once a month. I never go over 30 but sometimes I get some, ahem, lower class fella, probably public housing tenant, riding my ass and swerving back and forth, as if to express his discontent with my driving. I’d like to slam on my brakes but I’m sure he doesn’t have insurance so I’d be screwed. That’s when I wish I had a James Bond car with missles in the rear to blow him the hell up. That’d be cool.
August 7th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
Eh Scott how long you live in Palolo, were you grad high school from me and M use to live in Palolo for many years.
He went down 2:00 in the morning with his grandpa to get one number for the next morning. He goes back at 10:00 that morning for the test and what he past 
shock the hell out of us 
Since we talking about driving my son when pull one good one on me and my wife. He got his permit to drive when he turned 16, then a few months after he got it he said he wanted to try for his license, my wife said no way but I told her no worry he no can even park
August 7th, 2008 at 7:00 pm
OK. I knew I was reading wrong–I thought Crystal was Cat’s 22 y.o. DAUGHTER! I was ready to read a bunch of “oh Cat you don’t look that old” comments, but didn’t see any!
Getting a driver’s license, especially in Hilo where there’s hardly any mass transit, gave me a lot more freedom! For most teenagers, it should also involve responsibility such as having to transport younger siblings safely, but not for me since I am the youngest.
Recently, I took a van driver training course in order to drive the company van. Well, I was surprised that they tell you to NOT allow other cars or pedestrians to turn or cross when they don’t have the right of way. As the trainer said (after we watched the DVD), yes don’t share your aloha. Why? because as driver, you really have control only on what you do - you cannot control or predict what other drivers or what the pedestrian will or will not do. Of course, I still let people go. The underlying understanding is that the other person will not just go, but they too will look carefully and go only when it is safe.
My biggest pet peeve about driving? People who do not bother to wave mahalo after I let them go! Car makers need to add a ’shaka’ sign on the car hood, attached to some button in the drivers seat so we can push it to say thanks…
August 7th, 2008 at 10:27 pm
1. Use your turn signals.
2. The left lane on the highway is for passing.
August 7th, 2008 at 11:57 pm
K-den, I don’t feel so bad…I’m 35 years old and I still don’t have my driver’s license! Yes, I have driven a car before…I just never got around in getting the official state of Hawaii DL…With each passing year, I keep telling myself that I will get my DL, but I don’t. I get around Honolulu with TheBus just fine. The only thing that I don’t like is being on a crowded bus with several bags of groceries in hand! That makes for a really long bus ride home! My driving advice: Watch out for pedestrians in the crosswalks…Let the crazy drivers go ahead of you…Carpool to save $ on gas…And, if you find that you’re spending more time circling the parking lots for a space, catch TheBus instead! Easy breezy, get to where you need to go and then head on back home! Happy Aloha Friday to everyone!
August 8th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
crystal was in my american studies class…
August 8th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
I’m almost 30 and I don’t have a license either! Everyone in my family drives, and my husband’s been nagging me to learn to drive since forever, but I don’t want to! Sure it’s more convenient, but with convenience comes the cost of a(nother) car, insurance, maintenance, gas and not to mention the stress of driving in traffic, driving around in circles to search for parking spaces, and (this is inevitable, in my opinion), getting lazy (and fat; I’ve seen people wait for parking spots that are close to the mall/movie theater entrance, rather than park at an available lot that’s probably a 4-minute walk away.)
That said, I’ve been through several job applications that denied me each opportunity because I don’t drive. (Maybe that should be made illegal too!) I might have to get a license, if only to have a better-paying job.
August 8th, 2008 at 1:24 pm
1) Signal
2) Signal
3) Signal
Sorry, getting carried away - just can’t say this enough! Just seems like it’s getting worse and worse.
4) Like Scott says, Learn how to enter the freeway on the on-ramps the correct way. Accelarate ON the ON-RAMP lane before SIGNALING and CHANGING lane into oncoming traffic.
5) I’m with ric, pet peeve - no mahalo when you let someone in! But if they cannot lift the arm to signal - they not going lift the arm to push the button.
August 20th, 2008 at 6:52 am
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